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13 July 2006 @ 09:37 pm
grow a pair  
Yeah so I really haven't written in here much at all lately. I don't know why, I guess I am too busy, lazy, or don't really have much to say. Most likely the latter. Well I guess a lot has been going on, but I just really haven't felt like writing.

First things first I feel that I must vent. Most simply put: People always seem to be disappointing me. Like when people you think are your friends turn out to be total immature assholes. I know this group of guys who I have kinda been hanging out with for awhile, but now I am realizing that they are just a bunch of losers who do nothing with their lives except drink,smoke pot, sit around listening to music, and spend the rest of the time loving themselves and each other; while treating other people like they control you and you should be priviledged to hang out with them. They pick girls randomly and play them until they have them wrapped around their finger then completely do a 180 and change then act like childish assholes. I have fallen for it twice now, and now I can only be disappointed in myself for allowing it to happen and for being so vulnerable. I thought he wasn't one of "them" but now I can see how totally wrong I was, as now I feel like a complete idiot. Fuck them. I am tired of trying to be accepted by them and worrying if they like me or not. I feel like I am in middle school again and I dont need to be surrounded by people like that. Now I see why Natalie and Julie don't really hang out with them anymore. I really don't understand people like that. They are all so self absorbed and think that people should feel priviledged to hang out with them. Not all of them are like this, just a select few; two in particular. Some people just have to grow up.It sucks though because I have so much in common with them and had fun when I would hang out with them. I actually felt like I belonged somewhere. How do people like this do it? How do they lure you in when you know you shouldn't let them? I have a hard enough time getting many people to hang out with me and I'm not even an egocentric asshole. How do they do it? Hopefully they change and get themselves together and get their shit straight, but until then I will let them live their petty, lowlife lives being in love with each other.

Anyway,in other news, I may be quitting EBSCO. Well, actually, I may be getting fired. I haven't been able to make our quota as much as I used to and they put me on probation. They gave me 8 shifts and I have to make it 6 times out of the 8. Fat chance with the shit they are giving us to sell. Oh well, I have to get out of that place anyway. I had an interview at my favorite jewelry store Lasso the Moon the other day and I think it went well. I'm not too crazy about the minimum wage thing though, but I would get commission for sales. Then my brother's friend works as a waitress at the Roadhouse and she said she could probably get me in since she has been there for awile and they trust her judgement. I dont know about the whole waitressing thing, but I guess she sometimes walks out of there with $80-120 in tips a night which would be amazing. I guess I will give it a shot. I dont think I can work both jobs though, especially with school and such. I guess I will just have to see what happens
Current Mood: disappointeddisappointed
Current Music: Bjork-Hunter
kateblisskid on July 14th, 2006 03:25 am (UTC)
If you want a job that 1) pays well 2) has benefits and 3) is looking for part time help, we really need another teller at the bank. Let me know if you're interested. You can apply for the PT teller position in Aurora (a 20 minute drive from Kent, not bad at all) at chase.com (click on careers).
I'd be happy to recommend you.
i_am_a_piratei_am_a_pirate on July 14th, 2006 03:36 am (UTC)
hmm i will see what happens with these two, and if that doesnt happen i will definitely try that.thank you!